Three Navy SEALs on suicide among high performers and asking for help
October 6, 2026 · 15 min read
Andy Stumpf, Jocko Willink and Coleman Ruiz each talk openly about suicide and despair among elite operators, and each lands on saying the pain out loud, taking a next positive action and letting other people help. Hearing it from men whose identity was built on toughness makes it easier for people who think they should cope alone to speak up.
The rules, numbers and steps worth keeping in front of you.
- If you have thoughts of suicide, contact a crisis line, a doctor or emergency services now.
- Stumpf: the more open and honest he was about pain, the better it got.
- Stumpf: he worries most about those who stay quiet.
- Stumpf: break time into the shortest pieces and control how you speak to yourself.
- Willink: action is a cure for many problems; move toward the problem.
- Willink: detach and step back; the way out may be a few feet away.
- Willink: self-medicating with alcohol is a clear sign someone needs help.
- Ruiz: tell somebody; the people he feared would reject him rallied immediately.
- Ruiz: his recovery ran through full-time care, weekly therapy and, for a time, medication.
- Huberman to Ruiz: in a crisis, outsource your decisions to trusted people for a while.
- All three: isolation, alcohol and loss of identity after leaving the team surround these deaths.
- Ruiz: tough love should be used very carefully.
- Action alone does not cure severe depression.
- Check on people, especially the quiet and the capable.
This is the short form. The full insight has every expert's reasoning, their own words and the sources.