What the mirror does: honesty, self-compassion and the high five
Mel Robbins says half of people cannot look themselves in the eye and prescribes a mirror high five and pep talk, Adam Alter cites research on mirrors and honest behavior, Jim Curtis teaches a mirror exercise with a forgiveness prayer, therapist Lori Gottlieb includes the mirror among her daily tools, and Terry Bradshaw describes the mirror evaluation that followed three divorces. A mirror is a cheap, concrete way to practice both self-honesty and self-kindness, and these sources show the different uses side by side.
What two jobs does a mirror do in these accounts? Show answer
It acts as a witness that makes you more honest, and as a place to practice kindness toward yourself.
Why does a mirror change behavior, according to Adam Alter? Show answer
Seeing eyes makes people feel watched. Looking into your own eyes makes you more thoughtful about whether you are behaving rightly.
What did the coin-toss experiment show? Show answer
Without a mirror more than half of people claimed the winning result. In front of a mirror, reports returned to an honest 50-50.
Where does Alter suggest putting a mirror at home? Show answer
Inside the cupboard, pantry or drawer where treats are kept, so you watch yourself make the decision.
What is Mel Robbins's mirror habit? Show answer
After brushing your teeth, look at the person in the mirror and high five your reflection, without saying or thinking anything.
Why does Robbins keep the high five silent? Show answer
The brain already carries a lifetime of critical wiring. A gesture does not require changing your thoughts first.
What did Chris Robbins discover about the habit? Show answer
The power lay in his eyes meeting his eyes. He had seen failure in the mirror for about 15 years.
What is Terry Bradshaw's mirror evaluation? Show answer
Alone in a room, go through everything about yourself, good and bad, with brutal honesty, then decide which negatives to turn around.
How does Jim Curtis's exercise differ from Robbins's? Show answer
He has people look closely and let harsh judgments surface, then apologize to themselves and forgive each one.
What does Lori Gottlieb recommend? Show answer
Looking in the mirror for a full, timed 60 seconds each morning and noticing what feelings come up.
What is Gottlieb's distinction between shame and guilt? Show answer
Shame says I am bad. Guilt says I did something bad, and it should not become a life sentence.
What is a mirror habit not? Show answer
Treatment. Depression, long-held shame or thoughts of self-harm call for a doctor or therapist.