Meaning makes suffering bearable
Edith Eger, Pema Chödrön, James Hollis, Jordan Peterson and Mel Robbins all argue that finding purpose in pain, rather than escaping it, is what lets people endure and grow. It offers a path through hardship that doesn't depend on circumstances improving.
What conclusion do these five very different people share about suffering? Show answer
You often cannot escape it, but you can change your relationship to it, and finding meaning or a task in it makes it bearable.
How did Edith Eger survive Auschwitz mentally? Show answer
By holding on to an inner spirit and freedom her captors could not reach, finding strength from within.
What distinction is at the core of Eger's philosophy? Show answer
She was victimized but is not a victim; freedom starts with owning your choices instead of your circumstances.
Does Eger say to skip painful feelings? Show answer
No. She says unexpressed emotion makes us sick, so rage, cry or write an anger letter, then a love letter.
What is Pema Chödrön's central practice? Show answer
Learning to stay: when grief, anger or fear arises, remain with it, observe it without judgment and breathe into it.
Why does Chödrön say avoiding suffering backfires? Show answer
Distraction, control and denial deepen it, and clinging to certainty is the root of much anxiety.
What does James Hollis say meaning does for us? Show answer
Work that is meaningful to the psyche supports us even through suffering and sacrifice; without it, effort leads to burnout and depression.
What did Hollis learn from his own depression? Show answer
That asking how fast to get rid of it was the wrong question; at the bottom was a task, which led him to change his life.
Does Hollis think every depression carries a message? Show answer
No. He distinguishes reactive and biologically driven depression from the intrapsychic kind he experienced.
What carried Jordan Peterson through three years of illness? Show answer
His family, his friendships and the support of people who knew his work; he emerged grateful for ordinary life.
What are Mel Robbins's steps when nothing is going your way? Show answer
Say aloud that life is not fair, give grief a deadline, accept what happened, make a plan, then choose meaning.
What idea from Viktor Frankl does Robbins relay? Show answer
Everything can be taken from a person except the ability to choose their attitude toward what happens.